Wednesday, May 12, 2010 @ 8:30 AM
definitely not feeling anywhere near "elated" for today.
in fact it's quite the opposite.
9hours straight of school and im tired.
i don't even have the motivation to pick up the pen and start writing some sensible for tomorrow's geog test.
just wanna say,
hey matt, yeah it's difficult to cope and i really don't like to see you sad and all
so even if it means sacrificing some things to make life better
you'll get even more opportunities in the future.
and one more thing.
although it probably isn't all the glitz and glamour we see,
i'd still give anything just to give the whole process a shot.
even if it means i'll end up sacrificing or quitting some parts in the end,
but hey, as they always say, it's better to have tried and failed, then to never have tried at all.
you're a really blessed guy for being able to experience so many things in the first quarter of your life.
i'll never give up
just like how your flame of passion never dies
mine is just as defiant.
even though i may not be able to progress much further at the moment,
but once i get the chance and the freedom to do so
i'll never let it go.
currently the only reason that keeps me going is probably my parents and my ego.
they're the only reason why i don't just drop everything, and pursue my interests.
and they're the only people who never fail to make me think twice before doing lots of _______ things.
my ego is another major factor.
rather than saying im afraid of letting my parents down, i should also admit that i let myself down really easily too.
i know i have. this term and last year, and every bad grade i get.
although this term's starting to look better, but i know i've still let down myself greatly, in so many areas. as much as i don't want to ever regret and just work hard all the way, i know it's never possible with myself. firstly because i never believed in forcing myself to try to do well in something that simply isn't my forte. besides hard work, everything needs a small dose of talent. and trust me, without that small dose, everything becomes tiring and frustrating.
yes, there isn't a choice now.
but just give me sometime to recuperate cos i really need that time alone.
i promise i'll come back even stronger, and hopefully smarter.